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numb3rsflashficTitle: Starting Over
Pairing/Characters: Don/Charlie
Rating/Category: R/Slash
Word Count: 1099 words
Spoilers: Through mid-season three.
Summary: Charlie’s voice shakes, but not from fear. It’s full of want, and Don wonders how he missed that before. Or maybe, knowing his own limitations, he was afraid to look.
Notes/Warning: Beware the experimental tense.
Written: January 3, 2007
This is how it begins. Don stops by the house for a beer because it’s been yet another lousy day in a string of lousy days. He’s hot - the temperature is off the charts - and he’s tired and he’s sick of people, but strangely enough, he doesn’t want to go home to an empty apartment. So he goes to the house he grew up in, where he knows he can find a cold beer - or a couple of cold beers - a game, and someone to share it with who’ll just sit there and watch without having to talk, or who’ll have his head buried in a mathematics journal, so Don can connect without having to make too much of an effort.
The trip from the air conditioned GMC to the air conditioned house is like stepping into a blast furnace. Don can feel sweat forming and sliding down the middle of his back. He’d already removed his jacket and tie, rolled up his sleeves, but he’s seriously considering removing his dress shirt, maybe showering and cutting off that old pair of sweats he’s kept stashed in the bottom drawer in his old room.
Don brushes his hair back, wipes the sweat onto his slacks. After today, they need to be sent to the cleaner’s anyway. He stops by the kitchen first for a beer. The house had been so silent, he’s surprised to see Charlie there. Charlie’s leaning against the sink, looking out the kitchen window. He’s wearing a pair of shorts and nothing else. His hair is wet and there are droplets on his back; water or sweat, Don can’t tell.
“Hey, Charlie.” Don gets a beer out, uncaps it, takes a long drink. Charlie hasn’t moved. “What are you looking at?”
“The pool.”
Don takes a quick look out the window to make sure that there isn’t really a pool back there. It’s been a couple of days since he’s been able to visit, so who knows what Charlie did? “You know there’s not really a pool back there, right?”
Charlie sighs. “Yeah.” He smiles over at Don. “Remember when we begged mom and dad to put one in?”
Don grins at that. When he was twelve years old, he’d wanted a pool, so he’d coached Charlie on all the reasons why it would be a good idea, and then Charlie had made some graphs and drawn up a pie chart, but it was still a no go.
“We could be out there right now, skinny dipping,” Charlie says, and Don can see it clear as day. Feel the cool water on his bare skin, even though he knows it would probably be warm as bath water by now. See it cascading off Charlie as he ducks down under the surface, then plunges upward. See the droplets coating his eyelashes, beading on his face.
Charlie takes the bottle out of Don’s hand and takes a sip. When he pulls it away, there’s a drop of beer on his lip. Don can’t resist reaching out, wiping it away with his thumb. As if in a trance he brings his thumb to his mouth, licks the drop of beer off.
“Don?”
Charlie’s voice shakes, but not from fear. It’s full of want, and Don wonders how he missed that before. Or maybe, knowing his own limitations, he was afraid to look. Don pushes Charlie back against the sink and, despite the heat, presses up against him, brings their bodies into full contact. And Christ, that feels good! Too good. Don thinks he should pull away, but then Charlie squirms and Don’s not thinking any more.
This is how it ends. Don freaks. He’s had sex with his brother. Twice. Once in the kitchen and once in the shower. He can’t stand the look in Charlie’s eyes when he tells him they can’t do this again, but he can’t stand looking at himself in the mirror even more. Don leaves and doesn’t stop by the house for a beer for a long time.
Don still sees Charlie at the office, but they’ve stopped doing things together outside of work. He starts seeing Robin, but that doesn’t work out because all he can think about is Charlie. Then there’s Liz, who claims she isn’t looking for a commitment, just wants to have a good time. And they do, until thoughts of Charlie start intruding, even when he’s making her breakfast, thinking he should make waffles because Charlie doesn’t like pancakes. Liz doesn’t last long after that.
Neither do Pam, Michael or Tracy.
This is how they start over. Don stops by the house for a beer because it’s been a lousy couple of months. He’s lonely; he misses Charlie. He knows it’s his own fault, but it’s hard to admit that to anyone else. Besides, he figures it might be too late. Charlie appears to have moved on with Amita.
The house is quiet, but he knows someone is home because the windows have been opened to let in the warm spring air. He gets a beer out of the refrigerator then starts looking in the garage. Charlie’s standing at one of the dozen blackboards he’s got hung, a pair of earphones on his head. He’s wearing a pair of jeans that look like they’re about ready to slide off his hips and a t-shirt that hangs on him. He’s been wearing layers, lately, so Don didn’t realize how much weight he’d lost. Weight he couldn’t stand to lose.
Don doesn’t say anything, just lies down on the old sofa and watches Charlie dance between blackboard and desk, making magic with his numbers. He doesn’t know how much time has passed when a hand on his shoulder wakes him. Don opens his eyes and sees Charlie’s face hovering close to his. Eyes narrowed, brow furrowed in concern. He smiles, and Charlie gives him a tentative smile back.
“Hey.”
“Hey.”
“You got plans?”
Charlie looks over his shoulder at his equations, then back at Don with a ‘duh!’ expression. “No.”
“How about tomorrow, you got plans for tomorrow?”
Confused, Charlie shakes his head.
“This weekend?”
“Don, wha—?”
“I’ve missed you.” The admission is like shoving a knife in his gut and twisting it, until he sees the way it makes Charlie’s face light up.
“Really? I mean, I, uh, I’ve missed you, too.”
It gives Don the courage to say the words he’s said to himself every night for the past week, practicing. “I was hoping you might give me another chance.”
This time when Charlie smiles, there’s nothing tentative about it.
The End
Pairing/Characters: Don/Charlie
Rating/Category: R/Slash
Word Count: 1099 words
Spoilers: Through mid-season three.
Summary: Charlie’s voice shakes, but not from fear. It’s full of want, and Don wonders how he missed that before. Or maybe, knowing his own limitations, he was afraid to look.
Notes/Warning: Beware the experimental tense.
Written: January 3, 2007
This is how it begins. Don stops by the house for a beer because it’s been yet another lousy day in a string of lousy days. He’s hot - the temperature is off the charts - and he’s tired and he’s sick of people, but strangely enough, he doesn’t want to go home to an empty apartment. So he goes to the house he grew up in, where he knows he can find a cold beer - or a couple of cold beers - a game, and someone to share it with who’ll just sit there and watch without having to talk, or who’ll have his head buried in a mathematics journal, so Don can connect without having to make too much of an effort.
The trip from the air conditioned GMC to the air conditioned house is like stepping into a blast furnace. Don can feel sweat forming and sliding down the middle of his back. He’d already removed his jacket and tie, rolled up his sleeves, but he’s seriously considering removing his dress shirt, maybe showering and cutting off that old pair of sweats he’s kept stashed in the bottom drawer in his old room.
Don brushes his hair back, wipes the sweat onto his slacks. After today, they need to be sent to the cleaner’s anyway. He stops by the kitchen first for a beer. The house had been so silent, he’s surprised to see Charlie there. Charlie’s leaning against the sink, looking out the kitchen window. He’s wearing a pair of shorts and nothing else. His hair is wet and there are droplets on his back; water or sweat, Don can’t tell.
“Hey, Charlie.” Don gets a beer out, uncaps it, takes a long drink. Charlie hasn’t moved. “What are you looking at?”
“The pool.”
Don takes a quick look out the window to make sure that there isn’t really a pool back there. It’s been a couple of days since he’s been able to visit, so who knows what Charlie did? “You know there’s not really a pool back there, right?”
Charlie sighs. “Yeah.” He smiles over at Don. “Remember when we begged mom and dad to put one in?”
Don grins at that. When he was twelve years old, he’d wanted a pool, so he’d coached Charlie on all the reasons why it would be a good idea, and then Charlie had made some graphs and drawn up a pie chart, but it was still a no go.
“We could be out there right now, skinny dipping,” Charlie says, and Don can see it clear as day. Feel the cool water on his bare skin, even though he knows it would probably be warm as bath water by now. See it cascading off Charlie as he ducks down under the surface, then plunges upward. See the droplets coating his eyelashes, beading on his face.
Charlie takes the bottle out of Don’s hand and takes a sip. When he pulls it away, there’s a drop of beer on his lip. Don can’t resist reaching out, wiping it away with his thumb. As if in a trance he brings his thumb to his mouth, licks the drop of beer off.
“Don?”
Charlie’s voice shakes, but not from fear. It’s full of want, and Don wonders how he missed that before. Or maybe, knowing his own limitations, he was afraid to look. Don pushes Charlie back against the sink and, despite the heat, presses up against him, brings their bodies into full contact. And Christ, that feels good! Too good. Don thinks he should pull away, but then Charlie squirms and Don’s not thinking any more.
This is how it ends. Don freaks. He’s had sex with his brother. Twice. Once in the kitchen and once in the shower. He can’t stand the look in Charlie’s eyes when he tells him they can’t do this again, but he can’t stand looking at himself in the mirror even more. Don leaves and doesn’t stop by the house for a beer for a long time.
Don still sees Charlie at the office, but they’ve stopped doing things together outside of work. He starts seeing Robin, but that doesn’t work out because all he can think about is Charlie. Then there’s Liz, who claims she isn’t looking for a commitment, just wants to have a good time. And they do, until thoughts of Charlie start intruding, even when he’s making her breakfast, thinking he should make waffles because Charlie doesn’t like pancakes. Liz doesn’t last long after that.
Neither do Pam, Michael or Tracy.
This is how they start over. Don stops by the house for a beer because it’s been a lousy couple of months. He’s lonely; he misses Charlie. He knows it’s his own fault, but it’s hard to admit that to anyone else. Besides, he figures it might be too late. Charlie appears to have moved on with Amita.
The house is quiet, but he knows someone is home because the windows have been opened to let in the warm spring air. He gets a beer out of the refrigerator then starts looking in the garage. Charlie’s standing at one of the dozen blackboards he’s got hung, a pair of earphones on his head. He’s wearing a pair of jeans that look like they’re about ready to slide off his hips and a t-shirt that hangs on him. He’s been wearing layers, lately, so Don didn’t realize how much weight he’d lost. Weight he couldn’t stand to lose.
Don doesn’t say anything, just lies down on the old sofa and watches Charlie dance between blackboard and desk, making magic with his numbers. He doesn’t know how much time has passed when a hand on his shoulder wakes him. Don opens his eyes and sees Charlie’s face hovering close to his. Eyes narrowed, brow furrowed in concern. He smiles, and Charlie gives him a tentative smile back.
“Hey.”
“Hey.”
“You got plans?”
Charlie looks over his shoulder at his equations, then back at Don with a ‘duh!’ expression. “No.”
“How about tomorrow, you got plans for tomorrow?”
Confused, Charlie shakes his head.
“This weekend?”
“Don, wha—?”
“I’ve missed you.” The admission is like shoving a knife in his gut and twisting it, until he sees the way it makes Charlie’s face light up.
“Really? I mean, I, uh, I’ve missed you, too.”
It gives Don the courage to say the words he’s said to himself every night for the past week, practicing. “I was hoping you might give me another chance.”
This time when Charlie smiles, there’s nothing tentative about it.
no subject
Date: 2007-01-06 02:57 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-06 04:03 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-06 06:22 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-07 02:07 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-06 08:16 pm (UTC)You have given me back my brothers Eppes. I was drowning is a sea of Don/Will and thinking I would never see the brothers again. Sigh,
I like the "experimental tense" it draws the reader into the story.
This really was lovely. Thanks for sharing it.
T
no subject
Date: 2007-01-07 02:10 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-06 11:45 pm (UTC)And Charlie? I just keep seeing a kicked puppy....
It'll all be okay in the end.
Right?
RIGHT?
no subject
Date: 2007-01-07 02:10 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-07 08:37 am (UTC)Charlie’s voice shakes, but not from fear. It’s full of want, and Don wonders how he missed that before. Or maybe, knowing his own limitations, he was afraid to look. Don pushes Charlie back against the sink and, despite the heat, presses up against him, brings their bodies into full contact. And Christ, that feels good! Too good. Don thinks he should pull away, but then Charlie squirms and Don’s not thinking any more.
This is how it ends. Don freaks. He’s had sex with his brother. Twice. Once in the kitchen and once in the shower. He can’t stand the look in Charlie’s eyes when he tells him they can’t do this again, but he can’t stand looking at himself in the mirror even more. Don leaves and doesn’t stop by the house for a beer for a long time.
Nice flow and I think you've captured Don well.
no subject
Date: 2007-01-07 03:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-09 03:20 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-14 12:39 pm (UTC)"He’s wearing a pair of shorts and nothing else. His hair is wet and there are droplets on his back; water or sweat, Don can’t tell."
Beautiful! XD
no subject
Date: 2007-01-15 04:35 pm (UTC)