Between Trust and Doubt by Emma DeMarais (Challenge #26 - Doubt)

Title: Between Trust and Doubt
Pairing/Characters: David
Rating/Category: PG
Spoilers: Judgment Call, The Janus List, Trust Metric
Summary: David is caught between conflicting emotions
Notes/Warnings: Read the disclaimer on my LJ


For a long time after Megan went in to see Colby in his hospital bed David stood outside - unable to join her and unable to go home, his physical state mirroring his mental one. Trapped between trust and doubt, he wasn't able to forgive and move on nor was he able to retreat into the anger of Colby's betrayal, the anger that had sustained him for weeks when brief moments alone brought the danger of collapse from the strain.

He'd struggled to come to terms with the betrayal. He'd needed time and over the weeks he'd finally settled into an understanding of sorts, one where he accepted what his former partner had done without comprehending in any way how the man he knew, the man he'd entrusted with his life, could have done such a thing.

Yet once he'd convinced himself of Colby's complicity, it wasn't such an easy thing to undo.

His car eventually found its way to the FBI on its own, somehow knowing the idea of going home to his too silent, too empty apartment would be too unbearable.

The room was still set up as Don had left it earlier, with footage of Colby's confession on the monitors.

David loaded a copy of the tape they'd seized on the boat of Lancer's interrogation and torture of Colby and hesitated, his finger hovering over the Play button.

It would be hard to watch. It should be hard to watch. But if he watched it - and watched it as many times as he'd viewed the confession footage - he might just come to believe it.

He needed to believe.

He couldn’t live with the doubt.

He took a deep breath and pressed Play.

=
lark_ascends: Blue and purple dragonfly, green background (Default)

[personal profile] lark_ascends 2007-09-29 01:11 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, I liked this.

[identity profile] 4466584.livejournal.com 2007-09-29 07:43 pm (UTC)(link)
OOOOooooooooh

Yes. Yes, he needs to see it. The tape. Wow, I don't have words. I'm in such awe of the episode, especially the end, I just need more!! We need to write fanfiction! Keep it up!
fredbassett: (Default)

[personal profile] fredbassett 2007-09-29 09:51 pm (UTC)(link)
Very well portrayed. I haven't seen S3 yet but it doesn't stop me reading the fic :)
fredbassett: (Default)

[personal profile] fredbassett 2007-10-07 09:38 am (UTC)(link)
I finished S2 on holiday and even recruited a friend to it who got addicted and demanded the last 2 episodes the final night in one sitting! The men moaned but still watched them :)

I'm now on s3 thanks to munchkin and have watched the first 2. *dies* Edgerton!!!

I got serious Don/Charlie/Larry/Colby?everyone withdrawal and the munchkin save me! *grins*

[identity profile] melissima.livejournal.com 2007-09-30 03:55 am (UTC)(link)
Oh yes! Pauvre David. :applauds: This is wonderful. I can't wait to see what canon does with it but I know they won't handle it better than you. :)
ext_1004: (Default)

[identity profile] munchkinofdoom.livejournal.com 2007-09-30 08:01 am (UTC)(link)
Arrrgh! That was my exact reaction to this snippet! Tear my heart out, why don't you, woman!

This would have made an amazing book-end to how the episode began. Don opening with multiple replays of the confession, then David ending with multiple replays of the graphic proof of Colby's innocence...

[identity profile] irena-adler.livejournal.com 2007-10-03 04:23 am (UTC)(link)
I agree, this scene would have been a perfect ending to the ep (but no, we needed more speeding boat footage). Thanks for writing this!
spikedluv: (david&colby_guns_and-dark-skies)

[personal profile] spikedluv 2007-09-30 12:08 pm (UTC)(link)
I was hoping for some tags to this episode, and I love the idea that David watched the tape. I feel so bad for David, who's still feeling hurt by Colby's betrayal, but can no longer blame the fact that he betrayed his country. *hugs* I'm wondering if they'll use the tape in one of the upcoming eps, otherwise why have Lancer tape his interrogation?